Chapter 24

John continued the last four miles in a kind of trance, and when he finally saw the Colorado river, he felt like it was the promised land. He was a 40-year old man in below average shape, and a 13 mile hike made him feel like he had just ran a marathon. He dropped his bag down on the ground and found the strength to run when he finally spotted the water. He dove in and felt the cool, rushing water wash over him. It felt like a baptism.

     He played in the water for what felt like hours as he looked up and saw how far he had come. He still had the capacity to surprise himself, and that was a feeling he wanted to hang on to. As he dried himself off, he looked over and waved to another group he saw that had just reached the water. This entire hike was all about surviving until you got to the water, and what he saw on their faces was a look of relief as well as joy and redemption. He hoped that they saw the same in him.

     He found his tent site at the Bright Angel campground and settled in. A month earlier he couldn’t have even fathomed the idea that he would be setting up a tent at the bottom of The Grand Canyon, yet here he was. Tonight was a respite for him, and tomorrow he would wander even further into the wilderness alone, and the thought both fascinated and terrified him. His whole life had been a push and pull with other human beings, and soon he would be miles from the next living soul.

     That night more campers settled in, and John wandered over to the communal fire to be sociable and met some fellow travelers. At one time travel had ben his passion, and he missed hearing stories from the road.

     He found himself doing more listening than talking that evening, and he found himself fascinated by the people who had made it down here on their own pilgrimages. He found himself particularly amused by two women from New Hampshire who promised themselves they would take this trip when they both lost a total of hundred pounds. It had taken them nearly two years, but they had succeeded, and now here they were.

“Tell me guys, I’m a psychologist and I really want to know,” John began. “What is the secret to changing your life in such a dramatic way? I’d like to bottle it.”

“Well for one thing, we were sick of never getting laid,” the taller of the two remarked as they both laughed hysterically. “What do you think of that doc?”

“I think it’s a fine reason,” John replied. “Freud would certainly agree with you. He thought people did everything to increase their chances of getting laid. Alright, I’ll give you that reason without further commentary, anything else?’

Seeing that he was serious, the shorter one looked at John intensely, and seeing he was serious, replied. “Since you asked and since I’ve had 3 glasses of wine, I’ll tell you doctor. Fat people in our society are invisible. I know that sounds funny given their size, but I’m quite serious. It’s like you don’t exist to people, and I got sick of feeling like I wasn’t even real anymore. So I suffered and cried and sweated, and now I’m beginning to think people are beginning to see me again.”

“Wow,” John said quietly. “I appreciate such an honest answer. I know exactly what it feels like to feel invisible. In fact I’ve felt like that most of my life. Until I fell in love that is. For a fleeting moment in my life I felt like people could see me again. I think that comes with feeling truly understood by someone. I don’t think it comes around very often though. Maybe once or twice in a lifetime if we’re lucky.”

“Well you know what honey, I’m going to recommend a book to you and I want you to read it. It’s called “The Invisible People” and it’s about a lot of the things we are talking about tonight. Do you want me to write it down for you?”

“Uh, no, I think I can remember that,” John said. “Now if you ladies will excuse me, I have a long day ahead of me tomorrow. Wonderful to meet you.”

“Check out that book!”

He smiled and nodded. But he already knew what was in that book.

He had written it.